Have you ever asked yourself…
“Is this just how life is? When does it get better? Does it get better?”
I know I have.
The first time was in 2007, when I was over $120K in credit card debt, struggling with weight loss, mentally exhausted and feeling suffocated.
The second time wasn’t too long ago, when my marriage of 16 years fell down and I was going through the disappointment, grief and uncertainty of a break-up.
Thankfully, I was able to overcome these obstacles by learning about my limiting beliefs, which had been buried deep in my subconscious mind for decades.
It took some work, but I rebounded from my downfalls. And guess what? I came back stronger and happier than ever.
Big or small, we all go through adversity in life…
And overcoming adversity is a topic that I’m frequently asked about by students in my Ultimate Success Masterclass.
So, I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to share some of the frequently asked questions regarding this topic and (my personal) answers, which I hope shed some light for you today…
Q1. Dear Natalie, I was hoping you might share some of the tools you used to keep your positive state while going through a tough time in your life (in my case divorce).
Sometimes it's helpful to know what methods leaders like you have used to keep themselves on track when dealing with the negatives that come up in life. Can you help me?
A1. How interesting that you asked this question - I was just with a girlfriend of mine over the weekend who is also going through a divorce, and we sat down and devised a game plan for her to develop and maintain a positive vibration during this challenging time.
In the end, it all comes down to daily practices. Writing in your gratitude journal is very important, and I also suggest keeping an evidence journal at the same time.
Your evidence journal details what was good or what went right for you that day. Because the more you focus on the good, the more that good will expand in your life.
Exercise is great because the more active you are, the more endorphins will build up in your body to make you feel better. Personally, I listen to audio books when I exercise instead of letting my thoughts go crazy in my mind, which thoughts tend to do on their own.
I also highly recommend meditation, but use a recorded meditation so that your mind is focused on the audio, instead of spiraling into negative thoughts.
I hope these tools that I use to keep my mind in a positive state can help you too!
Q2. Hi Natalie, I’m having a hard time wrapping my mind around the power of the law of attraction considering external circumstances and hardships.
For example, someone in a third world country can dream, feel, have, be, visualize, etc., and still may never be given an opportunity to get out of their circumstances.
I even think of people who were forced into slavery. And certain groups of people that are excluded from opportunities due to prejudices.
On the other hand, there are some that look and fit a certain acceptable standard. Seems like they are given opportunities regardless of their knowledge, expertise or belief system.
Do I have a flawed way of thinking or can the law of attraction work for anyone and any circumstance?
A2. This is actually a question that I get quite often.
I believe that there are two different types of events that happen to each of us.
The first event is one that we create for ourselves - we dream, we visualize, we take action, and we manifest.
The second event is our life's dharma - the place we’re born, our family, our culture, and our soul's journey. This is where our lessons are taught and learned for our path in life.
Now, when the first event and the second event come together, a person is able to take total control of their lives and their destiny.
I absolutely believe that each and every one of us has the ability to dream themselves out of their current situation, no matter how unlikely it may seem to be.
I understand that even with certain situations, there is always good that can come out of it, and we see it happening more and more with work that is being done in third world countries.
No matter where you come from, if you have a desire, then you CAN create a better life for yourself.
Q3. Natalie - Every morning I start my day fueled and motivated, but at the end, I often feel unaccomplished, a little fearful and uneasy.
How can I keep my motivation going despite daily life challenges?
A3. It sounds like you can start your day well, but you lose steam towards the end of the day. I encourage you to keep a gratitude journal and write all the things that went RIGHT for you that day, no matter how small it may be.
When we consistently focus on the ‘wins’ we attract more of them. If we’re in a vicious mental cycle of what went wrong, then unfortunately we attract negativity.
Doing some purposeful activities, like meditating or exercising, will keep your vibration up and help you incredibly. Try some!
Q4. Lately, I’ve noticed myself getting uncomfortable with recent changes at my work and in my daily life.
I’m in my late 50’s and all of a sudden I’m struggling to overcome this unexpected resistance to change.
I am aware that this might be my brain’s way of keeping me safe, yet, how can I embrace change and remain focused on my goals, instead of wanting to disconnect from it all out of fear?
A4. I’m really glad you reached out, and what you are experiencing is not uncommon. I would suggest implementing the “Be-Do-Have Paradigm” - this is the “fake it till you make it” concept.
You act as if you are excited about change, especially when you feel that resistance, and that your success is already a done deal! It may not be in your life right this moment, but it WILL BE very soon, so act from this mindset and focus on your end goal.
That is the key to living this paradigm. Also, I recommend paying attention to your limiting beliefs and how they’re impacting you.
For example, saying things like, "In my late 50's, the world is too challenging and goes against my values, which makes it hard for me to be successful,” is a choice.
You have the choice to believe it and let it stop you, or not. You have the power to change your story and enjoy the journey.
Q5. Dear Natalie, how can I manifest abundance in my life when I’m living on a survival income?
A5. This is a great question!
Focusing on creating income at a survival level, especially when you have a large goal, is not necessarily the first step that I would recommend taking.
I suggest spending some extra time really thinking about what the end goal is, how you can create income from that, then what your next step is, etc.
Despite your circumstances, you would be amazed at how you can create income... especially with an Internet business!
I suggest taking some quiet time alone and asking the Universe to show you the next steps and allowing the answers to be presented to you.
Q6. Natalie - I do the exercises, listen to the tapes - audio and visual, write in my gratitude journal, etc.
But sometimes, the weight of all my financial problems hits me and the effort to think positively is like a rock I have to lift off of me over and over again.
That's when it feels like Groundhog’s Day. I don't know if it's the old paradigms that are stuck in my head or if my brain just needs a little more time to adjust.
I love my life... I really do. But there are times when I feel I’m just surviving and not making enough progress towards my goals, and that’s when I wonder…
Does it ever stop? Or is this just how life is? When does it get better? Or does it get better?
I've been pushing myself for many, many, many years. How long does it take? How can I overcome life’s obstacles? And how long will it take for me to finally achieve my dreams?
A6. It's definitely possible, and you WILL be successful in doing it! Just recognizing how deeply your limiting beliefs impact you and hold you back is a terrific start.
It absolutely does get easier the more you practice. It is true that some of our limiting beliefs can feel more uncomfortable and some are more stubborn or deeply rooted than others.
How quickly you work through them will depend on what you do to address them as they come up. Remember, this is a life-long journey, a WAY of life... it’s not about just reaching the finish line.
Usually there is a story attached to our limiting belief, something we say to ourselves that doesn't help or serve us any longer. For example, saying things like, "I can’t seem to advance in life because of this weight that bogs me down,” is a choice.
YOU get to choose if you buy it or not. You can change your story to one that serves you by surrounding it with gratitude.
Also, remember that every tough situation teaches or equips us with some new insight or behavior that is positive and helps us. Simply find what that is and change your story.
Without a doubt we’re all going to experience setbacks in life…
Maybe you lose the job you had for many years, become at risk of losing your home due to financial problems, or maybe you have to say goodbye to someone very close to you.
And other times, it shows up in multiple areas of your life, ALL at once…
And when it does… What do you do?
If this sounds familiar to you, then you’ll benefit greatly from this truly inspiring eBook called “Bounce Back Big”.
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Natalie Ledwell is a best selling author, speaker and successful entrepreneur. She's passionate about helping others to achieve their greatest dreams and ambitions through her personal development programs and her online TV show, The Inspiration Show.