Natalie interviews personal development gurus and inspiring people from all over the globe on her super popular online show!

Episode # 557   Meriflor Toneatto - How to Change Your Relationship With Money

About The Episode:

If growing up you were told: “Men know more about money than women.” Or “It's better to do good than be rich." Or "Girls just aren't good at math”, then today’s episode of The Inspiration Show could instantly change your relationship with money. Join us as author Meriflor Toneatto, an award-winning leadership and coaching executive, explores this topic and how to empower women to overcome their rooted beliefs in money and live their dream life.

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EPISODE TRANSCRIPTION

Episode # 557 Meriflor Toneatto - How to Change Your Relationship With Money

NL: Hi everyone! My name is Natalie Ledwell and this is The Inspiration Show. Today on the show we are going to be talking about money hunting, we are going to be talking about how to consciously create money, how to create wealth in your life, and do that from a place of service. Where you’re actually fulfilling a purpose. So before I introduce my special guest who’s going to tell us all about that, I just want to remind you that after the show’s over, if you click the link below this video, you can go through and download the free ebook version of my best selling book, Never In Your Wildest Dreams. So let me please introduce my special guest today, Meriflor Toneotto. How are you?

MT: Doing great Natalie! Thank you for having me. What a pleasure.

NL: I am so happy that we are getting to talk today because money is one of those things that I’m sure that there is someone who’s watching the show right now, that as soon as I said the word money, that there was a reaction that they had. Because, out of all the things on the planet, I think this is the one thing that if we had any kind of limiting programs or if we have any kind of, anything that’s sabotaging us from moving forward, the way that we think about money is one of those major obstacles. So let’s start a little bit with your story. So what is your background and how did you get to writing this book?

MT: Yes, yes. So it’s one of those stories, Natalie, that we all have a story around money and our relationship with money. And, really for me, it began in my early 20s when I left a very challenging marriage and I left with my baby girl and I had to build us a good life. And so I remember those moments when I was really really scared of money and we were living from paycheck to paycheck and even in those darkest moments, I remember thinking to myself that if I ever had an opportunity to empower women and especially around money, I would do it. But back then, I mean, I wasn’t sure what that was going to be. And over the years, I became quite successful and I reinvented my life and my career. And then when I became an entrepreneur I started working with women. And then we started to talk about money and a lot of conversations would come up about money and not feeling empowered with it or not being able to increase their income or had something to do with their self-confidence and self-worth. And then I remembered that moment when I said that whatever I could do to help empower women all those years ago, I thought this is the time. This is the time to write about what I’ve learned, what my journey has been. It’s time to help women change that current state of affairs regarding money and how we feel about it because it’s really our time now to really stand in our power and then use that money as a tool to help us pay it forward and become difference-makers. And so, that’s what I’m here to do and I’m here to help women have that shortcut, that I had to learn the harder way. And if I could do that through service and contribution, I mean that I am fulfilling my spiritual path as well.

NL: Yeah. You know, I remember when my husband and I separated about 5 years ago, I think in a marriage, we kind of shared the financial thing but I remember thinking all these things that I need to be responsible for my self right now, had to be responsible for my own happiness and my own body and my own wealth. It's like "Woah", I was just used that my husband always doing the investments and getting the businesses and all those kind of things so it was kind of scary. And I mean I grew up in a family of 8 kids in a country town in Australia. So obviously, I had some beliefs or some programs around money which I have done a lot to be able to clear. But it was kind of a really scary prospect of having to look at my future and I think there's a growing number of women who in a way, we’re divorcing in our middle age and we have to look at taking responsibility for that. So where is the first place that someone should start if they are looking at going down that channel?

 

MT: Yeah. (distorted audio) profound, Natalie, and it’s happening so much more now with women as you say. And the very first thing to do is to turn inward. That and look within because that’s where all the richness and the magic really is and we tend to always look on the outside and on the external for validation. And this one becomes an inner journey where you look within and you look at what are really are those beliefs around money and the fears around money that will keep you stuck, that will hold you back. And this is the time now to look at those stories from childhood and some beliefs that you’ve taken on for instance, things like money doesn’t grow on trees and you can only ever have great money if you work so so hard that you might even burn out. I have that programming as a child. And so this is now the time to release it and then you really isolate that and then you use the steps in this book because it is a step by step guide and it’s not only going to help you transform your life not only financially, but emotionally and spiritually as well.

NL: Yeah. I believe that men and women think to have a different outlook or different relationship with money, don’t you think?

MT: Absolutely! And I actually have a really good time looking at the differences in our relationship. And the first thing is we all have a relationship with money, both women, and men. And it's just a little bit more complex for us in that men tend to look at money in a very isolated way. Going from point A to point B. So it's a tool you're going to get from point A to point B. But for women, for us, we don't look at money in isolation, we look at money as part of a web of relationships, of connections, of meaning and of emotions. And then you pack those all together and you've got like a whopping story that we start to tell things to ourselves that may not even be true because they're just stories right? And one of the things that whenever I talk about women and men around money, I always say that you can really sum it up in this way, is that men ask for what they want while women ask for what they think they deserve. And that is a big one and I remember a really good male friend that I have and he says to me, there's only one thing I want to take away from your book because I love this line so much, and it's in italics and he says, I absolutely agree with that statement. I've seen it time and time again. And so it's okay for us to understand this and now we have the tools to get past it. Because what's on the other side is incredible for women. We know that we're caring and nurturing and all of that, but let's use it to our advantage because when we have more we will definitely share more. That's in our DNA as women. So let's celebrate that instead of being afraid of it. 

NL: Yeah. And it is an interesting time in history for women. In stepping up and having a voice and stepping into a bigger version of us. So your book is called Money, Manifestation and Miracles. So that's interesting that you put the word money in the same sentence as manifestation and miracles. So what inspired you to write this book?

MT: Well, I wrote it because of the fact that I actually came across this statistic that was really shocking to me, Natalie. Is that, in the U.S., women-owned businesses generate $1.6 trillion in revenue. Which is fabulous. Fabulous! And then, on the other hand, only 3.3% of them ever make it over 500,000 in revenue and less than 2% at 7 figures, over a million dollars. And this is nowhere near the rate that men get to those levels. And I thought you know what, this is now time to change that current state of affairs because what gets to happen on the other side is incredible. Because of the fact that when women are empowered with money, they become difference-makers. Because we're not only going to change our lives, we're going to change the lives of our family, our communities at large, and research shows that over anytime that women have money, they reinvest back 90 cents of every dollar that they make back to their family, back to health, education, and their families. And this is happening even in developing nations. And so let's just imagine what kind of world that we can have when women are more empowered with money. And this book could not have come out at a better time, Natalie, it's one of those divine timings, you know, of the Law of Attraction, as you are so well-versed in as well, and the time is now and it could have come out last year but it came out now, because it's really an optimal time for us to wake up and reclaim that power that we have as women. 

NL: Yeah. So, something that you do touch in the book is emotional currency. So explain what that is.

MT: Yes. So I talk about the fact that emotional currency, as money for women, is an emotional currency because money is very much tied to our sense of self-worth, self-confidence, our feelings of deserving, and feelings of safety and security. And this is such a big thing for women that we will know likely somebody or even ourselves at one point in time, when we stayed in a relationship, in a career, in a job, that may have no longer served us but we needed that security and we needed that self-confidence to get to the next level to take those actions. And so, that's what I mean by emotional currency. Now the good news though is that when women really can figure this out and get past any of those money blocks that they may have, whether it's their beliefs or their emotions around money that are limiting, they're going to go on and they're going to become unstoppable and that's when it gets really really exciting because they are going to be difference-makers.

NL: Yeah. The other thing that you mentioned in the book as well, because we know the importance of gratitude, but you talk about a money gratitude journal. So how is that different from a regular gratitude journal?

MT: Well, I talk about the idea of a gratitude journal which I've done for years and years. And then I remember one day thinking, how about if I start playing around with a money gratitude journal. Specifically talking about what I am so grateful for that has to do with wealth, with money, with abundance and see what happens. And usually whatever we focus on, grows. Right? Positive or negative. So I thought, let's focus on this. And I started really small, Natalie, and one day, I'm lining up to buy something and I remembered I had a gift card in my wallet and I was thinking, "Yey Universe! Thank you for gifting me with a gift card through somebody" or I win a free drink at a coffee shop. Those kinds of things because what that was doing, it was helping me to create the vibration and the energy to feel more abundant and then the big things can start coming my way. And that's really what it's all about. So try it out and see. I mean a lot of my clients have been doing that and they'll say things like, "Oh my goodness, I was waiting for a check and it hadn't come for a long time and I started doing this and all of a sudden there it was, it came sooner." so if we are focusing on the positive, we're going to get more of that. So let's do more of that. And have fun with the universe, play with the universe. That's much more fun you can manifest actually. 

NL: Absolutely. So when we talk a lot about how to create wealth, first you have to, you don't have wealth so that you can do what you want and then you'd be wealthy. And it's actually the other way around, you need to be wealthy or act wealthy or think wealthy first. So what do you suggest are some things that people can do to get into the mindset of wealth? So they can easily start to vibrate at the same frequency and then attract it into their lives?

MT: Yes, yes. Well, really what the mindset is we've got to be able to create a new mindset. And it's actually a lot easier than many people think. Think about a disempowering belief about money at this moment, whatever that may be, you know that if you are listening to this, there are no coincidences, you're seeing us talk about this, it's because it's your time to release it. So in order for you to release it, pick a new belief that all of a sudden makes you feel expansive. It could be, you know, money comes to me with grace and ease and it comes to me easily. Even for now, even if that's not the case, and look at how you are feeling in that moment, I bet you when you're thinking that, you're feeling expansive. And then when you're feeling expansive about that, you can now freely release what it is that's no longer serving you. And likely, that's the old belief that's no longer serving you. And it will be like a little bit of a tennis match in your head for a little while because you have to get used to that new belief. And how we are actually is we look into our external world to seek validation at what we believe. So now that if you are choosing to believe that the world is abundant and money comes to you with grace and ease, you're going to start looking for that and then it's going to start coming to you and then you're raising your energy, you're raising vibration, and then if there's a lofty goal that you want, you're closer to it from that frame of mind and that energy than when you were when you started. 

NL: Yeah. I agree. Wonderful. It’s been awesome talking to you. We can talk for ages about this subject.

MT: Exactly!

NL: Yeah, because I think this is the one thing that people struggle with. You know, especially if we are applying it, the Law of Attraction, it’s easy to apply to a cup of coffee or those easy things to be able to manifest. But we always seem to trip up on the money thing. So I’m really looking forward to reading the book and I suggest that if you are watching this show, and you are not financially where you want to be, that you want to get your hands on Meriflor’s book. So where can we send them to do that?

MT: Yes. Please go to my website at meriflor.co, that's m-e-r-i-f-l-o-r.c-o and you'll find a link to the book and all the places that you can purchase it. It's available online and at your favorite bookstore. And then come back to that page because I've got a free gift there for purchasing my book and you can download an audio of the Power of Practicing Gratitude.

NL: Great. Money, Manifestations, and Miracles, perfect! Well, thanks again Meriflor. Great chatting to you today darling. 

MT: Thank you so much, Natalie.

NL: Now guys, I encourage you to please share this video. Let’s get the word out there. You can do that by clicking the Facebook and the Twitter share buttons on the page. Don’t forget we’ll either have a banner at the side or a link underneath where you can go directly through to Meriflor’s website. And then after all of that is done, make sure you click the link below that so that you can download the free ebook version of my best selling book, Never In Your Wildest Dreams. So until next time, remember to live large, choose courageously, and love without limits. We’ll see you soon. 

Money, Manifestation & Miracles

 

 

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